something else

yes,
there is something else.
i'd like to apologize for all those times
i was hitting snooze or forging late notes 
when i could've been a front row joe 
in my first period creative writing class.
i could've tried harder,
could've written more,
and could've actually submitted on time for once.
the bag strapped to my back and the bags under my eyes
both weigh the same.
filled with papers and books and things
that i'm ready to set on fire because 
nelson doused us in gasoline.
i'm sorry i appeared dead most mornings 
when i spent most nights telling myself
one more episode of gossip girl wouldn't hurt.
maybe the hand-me-down shoes i was trying to fill 
didn't leave me enough space to write the words my bones
actually wanted to say,
because this semester i've been diagnosed 
with a bad case of writers block.
my blog was never nor will be perfect 
and i may have never made it on top five
but at least i'm still dakota rae
and that'll be a name i remember.